Untitled Beatles Podcast

Seventh Beatle Bracket

Glass Onions, baby! It's the UBP's third annual (note the TWO "n"'s and a "u", you grotty kids) Beatles March Madness! This week, we begin the Journey (#whenthelightsgodowninthecitay) to naming the official, Apple/Calderstone/Odeon/Ring'o Records 7th Beatle!
This year, for what feels like the very first time, the field is all musicians; and Tony, T.J., and our very own Tim Donaghy, Producer Casey, have some tough life decisions to make! Among them:
🎸 Is Beatlemania's Tom Teeley straight up more important to The Beatles than Linda, George, and original/best (of the) Beatles drummer Jimmie Nicol, combined?
🎸 Did Beatlemania's Tom Teeley invent the music video? Or just the now-wildly popular subset of music videos featuring extended tripping-on-bodega-fruit takes?
🎸 I just bet $20k on FanDuel that Beatlemania's Tom Teeley is gonna f'ing win this thing. I'll kill you bozos if I lose, do you f'ing hear me? And no, overly accessible legal gambling is definitely not f'ing up sports! Also, I'm sweating profusely. From the cocaine.
Life's too short! So you'd better back off, because it's Beatles March Madness! Stay tuned next for your late local news. Then, don't miss Martin Mull in the hilarious, new, can't miss, 1984 comedy, "Domestic Life". Only on (this is) CBS!
 
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Check out the Beatlemania's Mitch Weissman on "Joanie Loves Chachie"
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SPECIAL REPLAY / NME vs. UBP: Ranking The Beatles’ Song Catalog (2022)

These Three Cool Cats (3.5 if you count P3Z-Nutz, and we do not) are hard at work prepping our March Madness SEVENTH BEATLE BRACKET — coming soon to a podcast feed near you.
But today, we crack open the vaults at EMI to bring you one of our Fab Faves from back in 2022.
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[Originally released January 22, 2022]
Rage Against The Machine sang, “Know Your Enemy”.  Perhaps they were really singing “Know Your NME”, in reference to the U.K. magazine’s recent ranking of *almost* every Beatles song?Turns out, TJiskel and TonEBert’s rankings differ wildly from NME’s, and each other’s! Good thing (#FineYoungCannibals) Producer Casey is there to set the record straight, as we reveal our own exhaustively exhausting rankings of the Beatles catalog, and also delve into other major Beatles news, like:
🚦Which 1982 hit-maker doubled as a traffic eye in the sky for WBBM/CBS-2?
🏀🏈 Is T.J’s Derrick Rose Beatles song Tony’s Walter Payton Beatles song?
🐣 How’s the Sgt. Pepper Chicken at official show sponsor, Kenny Rogers Roasters?
Now open (only) in the Malaysia area! Less fat, less salt, less calories: it’s the #Untitled #Beatles #Podcast!EPISODE LINKS
See T.J. and Tony's complete lists ranking every Beatles song
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Help us climb the ranks! Be sure to subscribe to the show, and rate and review us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen.

Macca Snacks #1 / Paul McCartney's The 7" Singles Box (2022)

In the fall of 2022, acclaimed (fictional) documentarian and (fictional) podcast factchequer P3Z-Nutz planted a microphone in a flower pot embedded in the Shanoff residence to surreptitiously record T.J. and Tony as they unboxed and auditioned select cuts from the then-newly-released McCartney 7" Singles Box Set. (Don't worry -- our AI lawyers assure us it's totally legal.)
While we were unable to obtain Peter Jackson's proprietary AI sound-cleaning technology, we were able to get access to a turntable once used to play Pete Best's "Best of the Beatles", and frankly, the sonic results are astounding.
Please enjoy the first of what we hope will be like 80 occasionally recurring episodes—part of a complete, balanced breakfast—that we're calling MACCA SNACKS.
 
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BONUS! Maxwell's Silver Hammer from McCartney: A Life in Lyrics

The UBP is honored to partner once again with the good folks at Pushkin, as we proudly present Season 2, Episode 3 of McCartney: A Life In Lyrics.
 
This week, T.J., Producer Casey, and a rather talkative, dialed-in, obviously present Tony, listen in and discuss Macca and Paul Muldoon's deep-dish of "Maxwell's Silver Hammer". Bang Bang! On the door, baby!
 
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McCartney: A Life in Lyrics | Maxwell's Silver Hammer
One day in the car, Paul McCartney heard a BBC production of the absurdist play “Ubu Cocu” by French writer Alfred Jarry.  Taken by the rebelliousness of the radio play, McCartney wrote a sweet-sounding tune about a murderous medical student that seemingly lives in the same universe as Ubu: “Maxwell’s Silver Hammer.”
“McCartney: A Life in Lyrics” is a co-production between iHeart Media, MPL and Pushkin Industries.
The series was produced by Pejk Malinovski and Sara McCrea; written by Sara McCrea; edited by Dan O’Donnell and Sophie Crane; mastered by Jason Gambrell with assistance from Jake Gorski and sound design by Pejk Malinovski. The series is executive produced by Leital Molad, Justin Richmond, Lee Eastman and Scott Rodger.
Thanks to Lee Eastman, Richard Ewbank, Scott Rodger, Aoife Corbett and Steve Ithell.
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McCartney: A Life in Lyrics offers listeners the opportunity to sit in on conversations between Paul McCartney and poet Paul Muldoon dissecting the people, experiences, and art that inspired McCartney’s songwriting. These conversations were held during the past several years as the two collaborated on the best selling book, “The Lyrics: 1965 to Present.” Over two seasons and 24 episodes of McCartney: A Life in Lyrics, you’ll hear a combination master class, memoir, and improvised journey with one of the most beloved figures in popular music. Each episode focuses on one song from McCartney’s iconic catalog – spanning early Beatles through his solo work.
“McCartney: A Life in Lyrics” is a co-production between iHeart Media, MPL and Pushkin Industries.

The Birth of the Beatles (1979) Part 2

The Untitled Beatles Podcast is going to the top! What top? (Spoilers) THE TOP!
...The top of the podcast charts, bay-beeeee! Because it's time to review and dish deep 1979's lost-in-the-sands-of-time TV docudrama, "Birth Of The Beatles".
What makes this ridiculous, dated, Pete Best-biased movie such a fun watch? Is it gangster John? The music by Rain? The commercials by Mitsubishi? And speaking of really important Beatle stuff:
🌸🚊 Is the real tragedy of Stu Sutcliffe that he never lived to ride the CTA's Pink Line?
🧑‍🦰 Is the best Hall & Oates fantasy parody about the actor who played Cousin Oliver on the final season of The Brady Bunch, "Your Kiss Is On My Rist"?
🛳️ In Chicago improv parlance, is John to the Annoyance what Paul is to The Second City? (Angry Chicago Guy, from the other side of the bar, with Malort-stained eyes:) "And how come Tina Pohler don't accept my friend request on MySpace dont she remember me from the Improv Olympics alley? She too good for me now?"
 
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"The Birth of the Beatles" (1979)

1979. It was the Pete best of times, it was the Pete worst of times. In the 9 long years since the break up, there'd yet to be a major bio-pic about the Fabs, not counting than the rather obviously "Magical Mystery Tour"-influenced, "Jaws".
Enter Dick Clark, long before he was regenerated into Ryan Seacrest. Dick, with a little help from Pete Best, and a director who'd later work with Jabba The Hutt, created "Birth Of The Beatles"; basically the "Tune In" of its time. (Related: please don't sue us, Mr. Lewishon!)
The film aired repeatedly on American television for many years. T.J. grew up with it, via a VHS tape from ABC's Summer, 1980 airing. Tony discovered a different edit altogether, one which played in U.K. cinemas. Which begs the question: is this movie any bloody good?? We just might answer that, and also:
🥁 What's the best technical drumming in a film: the last scene of "Whiplash", or Pete Best's Cavern solo in "Birth Of The Beatles"?
💰 Which is the more controversial TV performance: Sinead O'Connor on SNL, or Eddie Money on "Fridays"?
🍻 (Angry Chicago Guy:) How come Channel 9 don't play "Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman" weekdays at 2 no more? And how come woke WGN let Tom Skilling retire when he's all I got left?
The drama, the humor, the excitement of (the great Wilco album) "Being There"; it's the #Untitled #Beatles #Podcast.
 
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Paul McCartney and Wings "Band On The Run" Underdubbed Mixes (2024)

Here’s an actual e-mail from The Untitled Beatles Podcast to M.P.L., sent on The Fifth of November, 2023:
Hi Sir Paul or Freda! We are the Untitled Beatles Podcast, America’s foremost discussion of profound, focused Beatles scholarship. With the holidays around the corner (AMERICAN ONES, LIKE CHRISTMAS! USA! USA! USA!) we wanted to represent all Beatles and Macca fans with this wish list for 2024:
First off, please, absolutely do not deliver long-delayed remasters of “London Town” and “Back To The Egg”. Who needs’ em! The most “recent” ones from 1993, with their harsh compression and lack of any meaningful bonus tracks, have held up JUST GREAT.
But, please do make us buy “Band On The Run” again! Only this time, change things up. Maybe put the songs in a different order? Take away all of the beautiful arrangements that are baked into this album’s legacy? Just one thing: please, do not include “Helen Wheels”. Feel me, holmes?
We at the UBP - the home of Producer Casey’s exclusive re-mix of your old band’s most famous single, “The Movie Medley”, as you’re well aware from your cruel lawsuit - guarantee that even the most skeptical fan will find this to be a stunning reissue we never knew we needed. Your skilled team can give this album an intimacy and rawness that somehow elevates the these already great songs. What do you think? Are you in? And while we have a minute with you Sir Paul, or Freda:
👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 What’s your favorite old porno rag: Screw? Naked? Stripped? Underdubbed? Cracked? Stacked? Smothered? Covered? Or Chunked? #TruffleShuffle
🎻 Is Tony Visconti the Phil Spector of producer/arrangers who don’t kill people?
👍❌ Is the BTS K-Pop smash “Dyno-mite” a fitting or, quite frankly (#StephenASmith) insulting tribute to “Good Times” legend Jimmie Walker?
Thank you, Sir Paul, or Freda, for liking and subscribing to our show like decent/non-awful people do! And, because we’re writing this on Sunday, 11/5/23 (Remember??), and it’s Daylight Savings Time, it’s probably already Meat Free Monday where you are. As they say at NEMS, Mazel Tov!
With Kisses On Your Bottom,
Tony, T.J., Producer Casey, and P3Z-Nutz
 
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The Beatles on Ed Sullivan 60th Anniversary (1964)

On February 9th, 1964, Paul McCartney With The Beatles (per the TV audio mix) exploded onto The Ed Sullivan Show, and into the hearts and souls of 73 million viewers. And many of their pets, which resulted in the incredibly soulful LP, “Beatle Barkers”. There’s a rooster on there!! - Howlin’ Woof.
By October 13, 1974, a mere 10 years later, Sullivan was dead.
No podcast has yet to explore the possible- no, plausible - connection between the two incidents.
INCLUDING THIS ONE, MY FRIENDT!
Because today, the obviously millennial hosts of the Untitled Beatles Podcast take a look at a historic moment in both Beatlemania and American television, from the perspective that only two vibing, digital natives/naives can provide. I mean this is from when people watched shows on TELEVISION? LOLOLOL, OK, BOOMER. Ageism is cool! And, our young bucks also daringly ask:
☘️ Are you more of a fan of Tessie O’Shea, the performer? Or Tessie O’Shea’s, a likely Irish restaurant in many mid-size American towns without much of an Irish population, where they treat Notre Dame football as if they’re some kind of hometown team even though they’re clearly not? And WTF with Notre  Dame fans? They’re like the f**king Dallas Cowboys fans of college football! Cheer, cheer MY ASS.
🎹 Are you more of a fan of Fred Kaps, the dutch magician? Or Fred Kaz, the longtime, legendary Second City music director (Angry Chicago Guy: and sea captain!) who was missing multiple fingers on his left hand?
🍝 Are you more of a fan of “Oliver”, the charming British musical? Or The Olive Garden, an actual Italian restaurant in many midi-size American towns without  much of an Italian population, where they treat you like you’re family even though you’re clearly - BIOLOGICALLY - not? And WTF with forcing you to eat endless breadsticks and salad? They’re like the f**king mafia of Darden-owned Italian sit-down casual chains! Five cheese ziti al forno MY ASS.
 
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Fab Grammys

It’s the dead of winter! So toss them [sic, intentional] wet towels on yer [sic, unintentional] space heater, serve your guests a hearty slice of calico flaming cat, and cozy up for the biggest awards show this side of the regional Tonys - the Fab Grammys! This week, Tony, T.J., Sizzle Chest Casey, and the increasingly ill-behaved P3Z-Nutz, tackle - powder puff “footie” style - the complicated history of the Beatles and the Grammy Awards.
The (Lou) Gram Two get into the electric moog mood groove (#Madonna) and also demand to know:
🪠 If it don’t rain in Indianapolis in the summer time, why does Schneider ALWAYS carry a plunger in tool belt? And how come said plunger is in the upright position every time Ms. Romano walks by, guy? Go on, answer the question.
Is Gary Sinise a true nature’s child?
🍻 (Angry Chicago guy:) How come Ryne Sandberg didn’t win no Grammy for the 1984 novelty Cubs hit “Men In Blue”?
🤖 (P3Z-Nutz:) Hey, you Malört-soaked jagbag, that 45 only featured Rick Sutcliffe, Jody Davis, Leon Durham, Keith Moreland, and Gary Woods.
😭 (Angry Chicago guy:) (begins weeping, cries out for someone named “Joan?”)
 
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Ringo Starr’s “Ringo” (1973) Side Two

Is it possible that Side Two of Ringo Starr's seminal 1973 self-titled album could be the finest piece of plastic ever committed to the work of the Fab Four? Or even second finest, after 2007's Instant Karma: The Amnesty International Campaign to Save Darfur" ...?
I know just the two guys for this job. (#CallAhead)
This week, T.J. and Tony step lightly into the album packaging and closing side of "Ringo", and along the way examine:
🛸 What's EMI got against count-offs, and what else might they be hiding?
🎞️ Maybe the 1974 live-action/animated short "Harry and Ringo's Night Out"? (#ReleaseTheBrucknerCut)
💨 How many "Oh My My" verses will Ringo cut before guy just owns it and Pelotons his ass back into playing shape? (#WeLoveYouRingo #PeaceAndLove #NotSponsored)
Warm up your winter with a bowl of Klaus Voorman's famous Zoup, and a second sumptuous serving of our Deep Dish into "Ringo". 
 
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